Monday, December 13, 2010

The Scrounger’s Cheapjack Christmas Special! #29: Ozzie and Harriet pt. 4

The last two Ozzie and Harriet shows we'll be dealing with both aired in the 1960 season. It would've been nice to knock both of them out today, but whoops, I flaked again. So let's drag this stuff out just a little bit more, why don't we...

The Other Other OTHER Christmas Episode: “The Girl in the Emporium”. Original Broadcast: December 14, 1960.

It’s Christmas 1960, and Ricky’s trying to pick out a gift for Ozzie, but when he heads down to the Emporium department store, he gets ideas of his own…especially when he sees the girl at the counter.

He was trying to dodge the whole necktie and shirt thing again, but he gets to talking to the lovely Terry and suddenly he’s interested in ties again. And shirts. And wallets. And socks. And y’know, whatever the hell it takes to hang around the counter a bit longer.

But at least he finished his shopping early.

There are complications, of course. The main one is Rick’s buddy Wally, who (whodathunkit) is into cute girls, too.

Wally was in the Christmas tree lot episode, too, but I was running late and couldn’t be bothered. No avoiding him this time.

Suddenly, Ricky wants to pick up some Christmas money at the Emporium, and hey, Wally’s all over that idea too! It’s like I’ve always said, grated minds think alike!

But gentlemen, you can’t both be Young Jack Donaghy!

Once on the sales floor, Wally and Rick are both distracted and distractions, since they can’t stay away from Terry. Now at this point, I wrote down my predictions that they’d either get themselves bounced or get Terry in hot water and be stuck with the other sales clerk. That’s the type of solution-finding you have to unlearn from more lively (or, to be diplomatic, less kind) shows before doing one of these shows, since we’re given an unanticipated third option (highlight for spoilers): the pursuit of a good woman drives Wally and Ricky to (what passes for) extreme feats of salesmanship when it turns out she's not interested in guys who can't close.

Well! That was quick!

Our Holiday Lesson For The Day: If you have an incredibly homely shirt that you’re trying to sell to some dude, a pretty young thing will get you 90% of the way there.

I’ll take a dozen.

But Don’t Take My Word For It: Youtube again. Everything will be posted to Youtube eventually…and DMCAed off of the Internet 15 minutes later. Not this one, though.

Next: The last of Ozzie and Harriet! Then I’ll have to find something else to cry about!

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